compelledtoprotect | Penance Inbox

[Steve stroked Shion's hair, happy to keep the boy close as long as he allowed. It felt good to have him close. He couldn't think of anything that would help him feel better at the moment than to help Shion feel a little less guilty and comforted.]

I did things I regret with and to other people, and I was injured plenty more than a little stab. But I'm alright. I'm used to living with guilt and at least I didn't damage anyone else irreparably. There's always that, thank god. I was . . . I was really dangerous.

[Steve was a menace and a monster when he gave in to the blood. And he'd reveled in it. He was ashamed of that, but there would always be a part of him that remembered his actions with fondness. He hated that part of him.]

You didn't hurt me. [It was a whisper, spoken into Steve's shoulder.] But those you did hurt... I'm sure they forgive you as well.

[No one could really blame anyone but Barbas for what had happened in that room. Even if that didn't stop the guilt.

He just hugged him tighter, trying to give as much comfort as he could.]

I could never hurt you Shion.

[Well, not on purpose. Steve didn't usually want to hurt anyone, but he was kind of good at it in several cases. He tried not to remember that. Steve petted Shion's hair, the motion soothing something deep inside. Comforting someone was just . . . lovely. Being the one to look after people was one of his deepest seated needs.]

I like to think so. I didn't want to hurt them either.

[He wishes he could say the same. But he had hurt Steve and he can't promise it won't happen again, not when so much of what happens here is completely out of their control.]

I'm sure they know that. [Steve was always so kind, Shion can't imagine anyone not knowing that.]

Do you want coffee? [It's ready.]

[He just gave a faint nod. Maybe some of the people he'd hurt knew he didn't mean it. Hopefully. Steve always felt he'd owe more apologies. Always. He sighed softly and reluctantly let Shion go.]

Yeah, I'd like some coffee, thanks. Smells good.

[He smiled over his shoulder and went to pour coffee, bringing both mugs over and nodding to the table for them to sit down at least.

Coffee might be a small way to make things up to Steve, but it was a start.]

[Steve moved to the table and sat down, watching Shion with a faint smile. It bothered him that the boy still blamed himself, but he could absolutely understand the impulse. He lived it every day. Still, maybe Shion would forgive himself one day, and until that happened, Steve would be there to keep confirming how much the kid meant to him.]

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wrap?

yup!