It took him a while to join the man. Steve spent the minutes making sandwiches and pouring some nice alcoholic drinks, something likely to knock James on his ass. He had a bottle Loki had made for him of the stuff he'd had on the island, the stuff got him drunk. It was tempting to let James drink it blind, but he wasn't that cruel. He set the meal up in his room before slipping into the bathroom and shutting the door.
Steve stripped quickly and silently, so quickly he all but tore his clothes off, and stepped into the shower. His hand found a home between James' shoulder blades, shoving the man against the cool tiles until his body followed, pressing and holding James in place with his sheer size. He was hard, which was something he couldn't control, but they didn't have to do anything about it. James probably still felt like shit, but damned if that hot body didn't drive him wild, even half-washed and more than a little stubbled. Anger didn't seem to dampen his ardor, which probably didn't surprise either of them really. Steve's lips moved against the man's ear, his voice a low growl.
"I love you James. I trust you with everything in me. I'd die for you without even thinking about it. You're what I always wanted James. Just remember that. No matter what you do, I'll be here, and I'll be on your side." It was the best he could do without naming the elephant in the room. Steve didn't expect James to open up about everything, or to trust and rely on him so quickly, but there had to be something there. He couldn't give forever with nothing in return. Steve would of course because he couldn't help himself or his intrinsic need to help and support those he cared for, but it would hurt. It would scrape him raw and eventually it would show. Thankfully that was probably years down the line, assuming either of them were even still alive.
Steve stepped back reluctantly, letting James move back under the spray. His voice was still growly when he spoke again, but there was little real anger in it, "I think I promised to get you washed, along with doing your hair, right? I'm real good at that part. It's basically getting a scalp massage. You'll melt."
James didn't look over even as Steve stepped into the shower, already anticipating the other man's body pressed against his own. Of course, the first touch caught him a little by surprise, and he let out a soft groan as he found himself pressed against the wall, lips parting with a soft gasp.
His gaze flickered to try and catch a glimpse of Steve's face, but he couldn't quite get him in his field of vision. Still, he didn't struggle, waiting until Steve was done with what he wanted to say, and... well, it wasn't like he could disagree with Steve on any of it. Were their roles reversed, James wouldn't rest until he got the truth out of Steve, too.
He turned around slowly, gaze trailing up to Steve's face. He reached out and brushed his hands up Steve's arms, feeling his heart pounding so fast in his chest he could almost feel it at the back of his tongue.
"I love you too," he blurted out, immediately moving on in a futile attempt that Steve wouldn't focus too much on it. He would, undoubtedly. "It's nothing, Steve. I just... got into a fight. With Jim."
He pressed his lips in and shrugged, blue eyes flickering to meet Steve's. "It was stupid. But it's nothing."
Save for the fact that James was still perfectly convinced that Jim had left him for good, but that was a problem for him to deal with later on, not right now.
Steve stared down at the man when he turned in his arms, not expecting what James said. He blinked, sucking in a sharp breath, then closed his eyes for a moment, fighting tears. His harsh swallow was audible even over the sound of the shower spray. Steve's fingers shook slightly as he touched James' cheek, leaning in until their foreheads touched. He'd expected as much to be the impetus for James' actions, since only Jim was likely to be able to hurt the man enough he wanted to black out, but those words! He could barely think of anything else for the moment, wondering if he'd imagined the confession completely.
"I care about your fight, but say it again? Please? James please . . ."
James rolled his eyes pointedly, letting out a quiet sigh. Of course he had to get fixated on that, didn't he? Considering Steve probably never expected him to say it, he wasn't too surprised, but he honestly hoped the man didn't expect him to just go around saying it on every occasion, completely unprompted.
Still, once more he could do. Steve would just have to believe that his feelings were still the same in the future unless he stated otherwise. James just wasn't the sort for mushy confessions, not all the time at least.
"I love you," he said almost matter-of-factly, even though he felt his heart beat faster in his chest. He let out a huff. "You're not gonna ask me to say it over and over again now, are you?"
He shook his head. Steve would try never to ask for it again, but just once more . . . He shuddered when James said the words again, the first time he'd ever heard them from someone the world wasn't just laughing at him with. He and Peggy hadn't said them in life, though they'd said them often enough on the island, where it didn't count. He'd known he'd never get them from Lucas either, much as his foolish heart had continued to wish. But James . . . James was different. He was someone that was real, not a dream, and someone who he could fight for and keep. He was a man Steve loved not despite all their differences, but because of them. They had something real and painful and glorious and fragile. It was everything he'd ever for hoped for really.
Steve's voice was choked when he managed to speak, glad that the water hitting them both could account for the few tears he couldn't hold back, "No. You wouldn't be you if you did that. I just had to hear it once when I was prepared, so I could remember properly." He was quiet for a few moments, hands tight on James before he managed to relax finally.
"I'm sorry you fought James. If I can help smooth things over, just let me know. But that's all we have to say on it. You're welcome as long as you wanna stay." Steve cleared his throat, pushing all the emotions aside for the time being. If James was staying a while, he could cry while the man slept, "I think I promised I'd wash you from head to toe, right? Close your eyes and I'll start at the top."
Even if he might not see the tears, he could almost tell they were there. Steve was more emotional than he was after all, James was just glad that they could both act as though he wasn't getting all mushy and sentimental over this.
His lips curled a little, and he tipped his head up to plant a small kiss on Steve's lips. That much he could understand, wanting to remember. Once the moment passed, he nodded, still stepping closer and letting himself stay in Steve's personal space, in the comfort and safety of those arms wrapped around him.
"I'm in your very capable hands, then," he murmured, then closed his eyes and tipped his head back slightly, letting Steve take the lead and direct him through their shower. They could have some fun afterwards, but right now letting Steve take care of him and wash him from head to toe was just as appealing.
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compelledtoprotect) wrote2019-05-05 04:31 am
no subject
Steve stripped quickly and silently, so quickly he all but tore his clothes off, and stepped into the shower. His hand found a home between James' shoulder blades, shoving the man against the cool tiles until his body followed, pressing and holding James in place with his sheer size. He was hard, which was something he couldn't control, but they didn't have to do anything about it. James probably still felt like shit, but damned if that hot body didn't drive him wild, even half-washed and more than a little stubbled. Anger didn't seem to dampen his ardor, which probably didn't surprise either of them really. Steve's lips moved against the man's ear, his voice a low growl.
"I love you James. I trust you with everything in me. I'd die for you without even thinking about it. You're what I always wanted James. Just remember that. No matter what you do, I'll be here, and I'll be on your side." It was the best he could do without naming the elephant in the room. Steve didn't expect James to open up about everything, or to trust and rely on him so quickly, but there had to be something there. He couldn't give forever with nothing in return. Steve would of course because he couldn't help himself or his intrinsic need to help and support those he cared for, but it would hurt. It would scrape him raw and eventually it would show. Thankfully that was probably years down the line, assuming either of them were even still alive.
Steve stepped back reluctantly, letting James move back under the spray. His voice was still growly when he spoke again, but there was little real anger in it, "I think I promised to get you washed, along with doing your hair, right? I'm real good at that part. It's basically getting a scalp massage. You'll melt."
no subject
His gaze flickered to try and catch a glimpse of Steve's face, but he couldn't quite get him in his field of vision. Still, he didn't struggle, waiting until Steve was done with what he wanted to say, and... well, it wasn't like he could disagree with Steve on any of it. Were their roles reversed, James wouldn't rest until he got the truth out of Steve, too.
He turned around slowly, gaze trailing up to Steve's face. He reached out and brushed his hands up Steve's arms, feeling his heart pounding so fast in his chest he could almost feel it at the back of his tongue.
"I love you too," he blurted out, immediately moving on in a futile attempt that Steve wouldn't focus too much on it. He would, undoubtedly. "It's nothing, Steve. I just... got into a fight. With Jim."
He pressed his lips in and shrugged, blue eyes flickering to meet Steve's. "It was stupid. But it's nothing."
Save for the fact that James was still perfectly convinced that Jim had left him for good, but that was a problem for him to deal with later on, not right now.
no subject
"I care about your fight, but say it again? Please? James please . . ."
no subject
Still, once more he could do. Steve would just have to believe that his feelings were still the same in the future unless he stated otherwise. James just wasn't the sort for mushy confessions, not all the time at least.
"I love you," he said almost matter-of-factly, even though he felt his heart beat faster in his chest. He let out a huff. "You're not gonna ask me to say it over and over again now, are you?"
Wanna call it done?
Steve's voice was choked when he managed to speak, glad that the water hitting them both could account for the few tears he couldn't hold back, "No. You wouldn't be you if you did that. I just had to hear it once when I was prepared, so I could remember properly." He was quiet for a few moments, hands tight on James before he managed to relax finally.
"I'm sorry you fought James. If I can help smooth things over, just let me know. But that's all we have to say on it. You're welcome as long as you wanna stay." Steve cleared his throat, pushing all the emotions aside for the time being. If James was staying a while, he could cry while the man slept, "I think I promised I'd wash you from head to toe, right? Close your eyes and I'll start at the top."
Looks good to me!!
His lips curled a little, and he tipped his head up to plant a small kiss on Steve's lips. That much he could understand, wanting to remember. Once the moment passed, he nodded, still stepping closer and letting himself stay in Steve's personal space, in the comfort and safety of those arms wrapped around him.
"I'm in your very capable hands, then," he murmured, then closed his eyes and tipped his head back slightly, letting Steve take the lead and direct him through their shower. They could have some fun afterwards, but right now letting Steve take care of him and wash him from head to toe was just as appealing.